Why is it so hard to say no while budgeting?
Maybe it’s your friend who’s wanting to go out to dinner, or your partner with a higher income who is always suggesting expensive activities. Perhaps it’s family expecting you to participate in family functions like holiday gift giving or attending events like your fourth cousin’s twice removed on your step aunts side wedding. If you’re currently in your debt free or wealth accumulation journey, these events can derail your efforts.
Whatever it is, the pressure to say yes can be over whelming. So before we go any further, I just want to say it’s okay to say no. Yes, it’s a lot easier said than done, but it is 100% okay to do. In fact, there are a variety of ways.
Here are 4 ways to say no while budgeting
“It’s not you, it’s me”
It’s cliche, but it doesn’t mean it’s not true. Would you love to go out to frequent dinners or take frequent vacations? I’m guessing the answer is yes, but doing these things won’t serve you in your current journey. So to help keep your relationships intact, you can always let them know it’s not them, it’s you.
Suggest a different activity
If it’s a one on one get together, you can suggest an alternative, lower cost activity. Perhaps a walk in the park instead of lunch or dinner. Or a movie night in with a meal the two of you can make together, like homemade pizza. These activities are much easier on your pocketbook and will serve just as well as an expensive dinner to get you quality time with your person.
Join later
If invited out to a group event, it can be harder to suggest alternative plans. So rather than agreeing to attend and jeopardizing your journey, joining later is a possible happy medium. Invited out to dinner? RSVP saying that you can’t wait to see the group and that you’ll be skipping dinner and will show up afterwards for drinks. Asked to join on a group trip? Perhaps join them for just the weekend rather than the entire week. Quality time with our loved ones is important, these last few years have certainly taught us that, but being mindful of our spending is key to our success.
Just say no
And finally, there is always the option to honestly and simply say no. Something along the lines of “I’d really like to attend and participate, but I’m sorry it’s just not in my budget right now.” You can follow these up with one of the previous suggestions, or it can simply stand on it’s own. Remember, you don’t owe anyone an explanation.
The pressure placed on us by society, friends and family can make it uncomfortable to say no. This is especially true if you’re a people pleaser like me. But sometimes saying no is exactly what we need to do.
So yes, it’s okay to say no while budgeting and not only can you say no, you can do it gracefully.
Whenever I struggle with this myself, I always remind myself “Those who mind don’t matter, and those that matter don’t mind”. (Thank you, Dr Seuss) Be kind to yourself.